Feel Again
by orange-frappuccino
Summary: Grace Lucas withdrew herself from the 09ers long before the death of Lilly Kane, establishing a new group of friends. Over the Christmas holidays, she found herself drunk & in the arms of Logan Echolls, her archenemy. When Logan doesn't a) take advantage of her or b) spread rumors about their night together, Grace is determined to find out what exactly what happened that night.
1. Prologue: Sex & Candy

**Prologue  
**_Sex & Candy_

The first day back to school after winter break already had me dreading the rest of the year. Over the holidays, I managed to get piss drunk and hook up with none other than Logan Echolls. I barely remember a thing about it, besides him driving me home and asking my brother to make sure I stayed upright through the night. Why he actually made an effort to take me home, I didn't know (or remember), but it was humiliating.

I hadn't seen or spoken to Logan since then. I wanted to keep it that way, except for the fact that we had several classes together. When I looked behind me to lock my car, I saw him pull in next to mine. I cringed; we always both sprang from last period, straight to our cars at the same time.

I survived first period without any hassle. The other part to my embarrassment was that most people had heard about my little tryst with Logan. I'd heard people whispering at me through the hallways, or blatantly shouting my name and congratulating me. I wanted to make a comment about how we dated in preschool, but I knew that wouldn't do me any favors. I had to let go of my self-righteousness for once and stay quiet, otherwise I could make things a lot worse for myself than they already were.

I passed by Olin and Gabby, who were there that night and assured me I was stable at the party.

"I don't understand how you ended up with Logan," Gabby shook her head. "I mean, you were clear-headed. You were tipsy, yes, but a bunch of 09ers came up to you and tried to take you to bed. You shut them down pretty hard,"

That only made me feel worse. Why would I shut everybody except Logan down? Yes, there was a part of me that was attracted to him; if I denied that, it would be a huge lie. But that didn't change the fact that he was an arrogant asshole, who had everything and anything that he wanted. I would never disrespect myself by letting Logan Echolls into my pants. It never got that far, but had he not taken me home, who knows what could have happened.

There was only one thing I knew, and it was that I needed to find out what the hell happened.

**This was a random idea that came to mind this morning. I know this is a stupidly short intro, but I felt like I wanted to get a little bit of a starter and start a new chapter. Veronica will be in this story, and will not be an antagonist nor an 09er, but I will already dispel that her and Logan will not be paired together!  
**

**Now, would you rather see her with Piz (the glory of FanFiction is that I can AU the shit out of this and place him in Neptune High!) or Duncan? Or anybody else. Up to you, since I know ideally most people would like to see her with Logan.**


	2. Chapter 1: All They Ever Do is Talk

**Chapter 1  
**_All They Ever Do is Talk_

Logan managed to stay clear from me for the first two periods. We had second period together, which was biology, but instead of sitting in the row beside me he sat near the corner, as close as possible to the door. _So we're both playing this game, _I thought. I couldn't wrap my head around why he wasn't taunting me when he had the perfect opportunity to do so; I was so wasted that I couldn't remember a damn thing, besides him taking me home to my brother. I must've told him to take me there and not to my mother, because I still was in my right mind enough to remember that she would murder me.

It was highly unusual of Logan not to take pride in dehumanizing a female, especially one that has little to lose. Considering my lady-parts were still intact when I woke up the next afternoon, I decided that we hadn't done the deed, because if health class serves me right, I would definitely have felt it. But according to everyone else, we definitely fooled around; and there are still many depths to reach before hitting the bottom. Dick had found me between classes and tried to high five me, but I high fived him in the face. I wasn't in the mood for his humor, since I knew it would be all about that night. Had he instead tried to cheer me up, make some irrelevant sexual joke, I probably would've embraced him. But not today.

When lunchtime came around, I could barely make my way to the line without being haggled. Apparently, everybody cared about my love life now, either congratulating me and presuming I'd been to bed with Logan, or chastising me for "stealing Lilly's man". Lilly had been dead for six months, but it was still unacceptable for anybody to touch him, of course.

I was almost at Logan's table when Richie Morris started whistling at me.

"Here comes the fox!" He howled. "You must have amazing skill to have bedded Logan, my girl. _Damn_! That rack is-"

Before I could even process anything, Logan had toppled Richie and had him pinned to the ground. "You leave her the hell alone," he seethed, "or so help me god I'll fucking end you."

My jaw dropped to the ground. Why the fuck would Logan of all people defend me? My friends came up behind me, in as much shock as I was. The entire school couldn't decide whether to look at me or Duncan, and Richie scurried off to collect himself. Logan glanced my way and bolted to his yellow X-Terra, pulling out of the parking lot and leaving for the day.

**x**

Gabby, Olin and I decided to leave campus for lunch. Too much had happened to stay there, and I debated even returning for my last two classes.

"Are you sure you two haven't spoken since that night?" Gabby asked. "I mean, if you two are seeing each other..."

"Are you kidding me? No! Absolutely not. I haven't even seen him in town. He sat as far away as possible from me in biology today, and he's supposed to be partners with Jess. He completely ditched her for the lab to get away from me."

Olin raised an eyebrow. "What if something happened that night... obviously not sex, but something deep, you know?"

I scoffed. "Not bloody likely. I think Logan is ashamed that he hooked up with me, and is trying to make it go away. He doesn't want people to talk about it, or bring it up, and he wants to forget it ever happened."

They both shrugged. I don't think either of them believed that we hadn't spoken since that night, or that we weren't secretly seeing each other.

When we finished lunch, I dropped them off back at school and headed to Logan's gated community. I'd spent many nights at the Echolls' house for functions and charity bashes. My parents had once been very involved in the community, well, particularly their money. When my father fled with everything, Lynn still extended the invitations to my mother, but the attendance no longer felt the same, especially once I stopped spending time with the 09ers.

The security guard at the gate was a friend of my brothers, and although it could have cost him his job, he let me in without calling the Echolls' house. I thanked him graciously and drove down the road, parking in front of the gates to his house. I wasted no time slinking through the gates, hoping nobody saw me as I crept up to his front door. I hoped his parents weren't home, as they'd be inclined to question how I made it to their door without a phone call to their house to let me in.

I knocked furiously until I heard footsteps approaching. I looked back to my mom's BMW, thankful that I opted for her car and not my 1997 Accord, as it would be a little misplaced in Logan's neighborhood. It was generally out of place in Neptune, but people dealt with it.

Logan opened the door, unsure of what to say. He remained quiet for a moment, trying to find the worlds. "What are you doing here?" It was barely a question, more of a warning to leave before he lost it, or more importantly, before someone saw me there.

"I want to know what happened that night, Logan. I know you were sober, and I know that I was out of my mind. I want to know why you pummeled Richie today. It's not like people haven't been saying things like that to me for years, so why now?"

That wasn't exactly true. I'd never been verbally assaulted, just jabs from my old "crew" here and there. I was generally friendly with everyone except that particular group.

"As you may have heard, I like to keep my personal life _personal_. I don't appreciate when people, in my social group or not, decide to make a commentary."

"That hardly answered my question. What happened that night Logan; it's not a question anymore." I was angry — and desperate.

He swallowed hard and looked me in the eyes. "You were drunk, what's new, and came onto me, what's new. It was another fucking night. I took you home, like anybody would, mostly so that my reputation wouldn't be damaged. Are you happy? Did you want to hear something else? Goodbye."

He slammed the door right in my face. I fought tears as I speed walked back to the car, my eyes stinging. He was lying, and I knew it, but he was also completely cruel. I knew Logan was a dick, especially since Lilly died, but he had never been quite that rude. He was covering something; had we slept together? Had we both lost control that night? I felt perfectly fine aside from the hangover the next morning, but everybody's first experience is different.

As hard as I fought, the tears eventually escaped. It took me almost thirty minutes to drive to my house that was ten minutes away.

**Thank you for the reviews, follows, etc. This song is titled after the Earlimart song,_ All They Ever Do is Talk_. It was featured on the first season of Veronica Mars. I can't wait to get past the "early stages" of this story, as I'm just warming up. Thankfully I'm finished school as of Friday, and I'm only working part-time for the next two weeks, so my life will consist of food, sleep, Orange is the New Black... and writing.  
**

**Thank you! **


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